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Tooth and Claw (Kootenai Pack Book 1) Page 4
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The exposed bones were splintered and sickening to look at. There was nothing I could do about that. I was bleeding heavily. Instincts told me to lick the wound. The copper taste of blood did not soothe my wolf. I whined when I caught sight of what remained of my paw still in the trap. Black fur, pink muscles, pale white bones. Revulsion riled in me. I wanted to vomit. I couldn’t believe what I had done. I continued to lick my wounds. There was no going back, I did what I had to do to survive.
I heard howls of more wolves. Maybe Kendrick had gone to get them to hunt me down. Maybe his plan all along was for me to die. I needed to get back to my car, I needed to keep moving. I sniffed the ground until I picked up a scent I recognized as my strawberry shampoo. I followed it. The grace I had lacked when I first shifted was back tenfold. I’d lope several steps and forget I’d lost a paw and I’d crash to the ground landing hard on the already splintered bones. I’d yelp and try to bite back my pained cries. I couldn’t let them find me.
I found the tree line before the ditch where my torn sundress laid. I made it. I willed my body to shift. Sunday shifter school had made it sound easy. Just picture yourself as a human and human you’d become. It wasn’t easy. I had to imagine forcing my toes through my claws and reshaping my body back together. It felt like it took hours before my body was human again. The moon was high overhead and I was exhausted. But I needed to keep going. I needed to get out of here, away from pack land. Away from him. I was naked. I was bloody, and my arm was still bleeding where a hand had once been.
I wrapped the stump in the torn dress. It was a painful process. Every nerve ending felt exposed. Every brush of the fabric rioted protestations through to my core. I pulled the commencement robe over my body, grateful that I’d been given one three sizes too large. I sat in the driver’s seat of my car and tried to force myself to go.
I still felt the tug. That pull toward Kendrick. I wanted to race back to town, tell the pack I’d changed, and he was mine. But I couldn’t let that happen. They could never know what I was. Who I was. I leaned over painfully to turn the key in the ignition, it roared to life. I had to stay leaned to get steering column to switch gears and get the car into drive. I’d never been more grateful to have an automatic with a steering wheel gear shift. I didn’t know how I’d have managed if I’d had to try to shift from the center.
I put the car in drive and let my foot off the gas. I had to focus. I had to get out of here. Away from the pack. I needed to get to Easterville. Only a thousand miles to go before I could sleep.
12
Present day
“And you have to charge it?” my mother was fascinated with my bionic hand. She asked me to show her all the articulating movements to prove that I was truly able to function.
“She uses that excuse to get out of work more often than she should,” Evan interrupted bringing out three plates of his famous eggs benedict with bacon and toast. He set one down in front of my mother and pulled up a chair for himself. I narrowed my eyes and him and he smiled charmingly at me.
“How did you afford this?” she asked still mesmerized by the technology.
“They’re getting more affordable every year,” I told her, and it was true, 3D printing technology had revolutionized my options in a few short years, “But I didn’t afford this, Easterville,” I was getting choked up, “The town...”
Evan laughed, “One of our regulars, Louie, got together with a couple other regulars, who got together with the town council, and they hosted a huge carnival fundraiser called ‘Bionic Barmaid’ and raised enough money for a fancy new arm, as well as a small repair fund.”
I was still incredibly humbled by the generosity of the town, “That Louie,” was all I could manage to say.
“Wow,” my mother agreed, “That is... wow,” after a few minutes of us silently eating she finally asked the question she wanted to ask, “How did you... how did...”
Evan raised his eyebrow at me, “She doesn’t know?”
I shrugged.
A growl rose low in Evan’s throat, “Evan, you’re scaring her,” I hissed. I could sense my mother’s wolf whimpering, cowering. She didn’t need to be shifted to have her tail between her legs.
“Lee’s wolf chewed it off after it got caught in a trap,” Evan growled. My mother's eyes widened, and she looked at me with a renewed interest.
“That can’t be,” she muttered, lost in thought.
“Oh, it can be and if that sonofabitch ever sho-”
“Evan!” I shouted, “Not now.” Evan had no idea what a riled grizzly could do to a submissive wolf even if they both remained in human form.
Evan stood abruptly from his chair, “I need to run the credit cards receipts from last night.”
After Evan disappeared into the back office my mother leaned over the table, “Who’s Lee?”
“I’m Lee, mom,” I told her, “I go by my middle name here. I didn’t want to be Aster the dud anymore.”
“You have a wolf, Aster...Lee?” she asked quickly correcting names.
I nodded, ashamed. I wasn’t sure if I was more ashamed that I hadn’t told her, or that she couldn’t tell.
“When? How long?” she asked her eyes filled with joyous wonder, “You should come back with me. There’s always a spot in the pack. Alpha Biel is such a-”
I shook my head quickly, “I can’t come back with you. I can’t ever go back, I was exiled, remember?”
“That was before your wolf,” she said with a warm smile, “You’re pack. Surely your wolf wants a pack.”
She did. She wanted a pack more than she wanted to breathe, I shook my head, “We can’t go back.”
“What happened, Aster?”
“I can’t tell you.”
“Can you at least tell me how long?”
“Since graduation,” I said hanging my head low.
“No,” she breathed, “It can’t be.”
I sagged in my chair, “You can’t tell anyone-”
“You’re the wolf from the trap,” she whispered, “Kendrick’s mate.”
13
10 years earlier
I was officially off pack land when the aching pull started to dim. I still wanted to turn around and go back with every fiber of my being. But I pushed forward. My arm was fire. It was agony. It pulsed with pain with every movement. I had to focus on driving. I found a rest stop off the interstate. It was incredibly late and there were no other cars in the lot. I pulled out my backpack that I’d packed with travel essentials and trudged barefoot into the building. The lights flickered as I made my way to the sinks.
Dark bags framed my green eyes, the black eye Kendrick’s friends had given me what felt like Years Earlier was now a swollen dark purple color. In the back of my mind I vaguely remembered that shifting supposedly healed. Something about the magic. The stronger the wolf, the more shifting would heal the human. My wolf must have been very weak, for a simple bruise to not have healed. I looked down at my worst injury, the stump had long since bled through the scraps of sundress and into the graduation robes.
I looked like the final scene of a slasher flick, where the lone surviving female walks from the woods to the police. My black hair was matted with blood and full of twigs and leaves. My face and neck were bruised, swollen, and marred with small scrapes randomly scattered over my flesh. My feet were bloody and cracked, muddy and embedded with small gravel stones.
I carefully unwrapped my sundress from my stump. I thought I’d pass out with every rotation of the fabric. Each layer was heavier than the last, thick with hardening blood stains. I turned the faucet on and watched the water run red. Finally, the stump was revealed, and I vomited at the sight of it.
I needed to get to a hospital and soon. But I couldn't go. They’d find me there. If they found me, he’d surely kill me. I rinsed the stump doing my best to swallow the pain. There was only one option left for me, I’d have to shift. It had hurt so bad the first time, I didn’t want to do it again, but I wouldn’t
survive if I didn’t.
I wandered over to the door to the bathroom and locked it. I knew my wolf would race to the pack lands if given half a chance. She couldn’t get out. I also didn’t want anyone to get in and discover me. I followed the drops of blood back to the sink. I stared at myself in the mirror and willed the wolf out.
“I know you’re hurt and scared,” I whispered to her, “I am too. But we need to do this. We need to heal each other.”
I felt the pricks along my skin as fur started to erupt slowly. The fire spread as my muscles started to pull into a new shape. My joints popped as my bones grew and shortened. I watched my face morph from the one I knew to the beast inside of me. I watched the bloody human stump turn into a scarred wolf one.
My wolf was exhausted from the change. She curled into a ball under the sink and fell asleep.
14
Present Day
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I half lied. I knew I was Kendrick’s mate. I didn’t know how she knew Kendrick had a mate.
“During the graduation run, Kendrick came racing to the pack in a panic, screaming that he’d found a wolf,” my mother explained, her brows furrowed, “that she’d been caught in a trap and he couldn’t free her. Alpha Biel organized the sentinels to rescue her. When they got there, all that remained was a black wolf paw. The whole pack followed the blood trail but lost the scent at the highway. No one had ever seen Kendrick that worked up, so the pack assumes it was his mate.”
“He came back for me?” I couldn’t help the hope and sadness in my voice. I felt my wolf yip and chirp inside of me. She’d never understood the words that the man had said. She only remembered his gentle pets, his tantalizing smell, and his haunting eyes.
I shook my head out of the wolfish dreams, I knew better. He’d watched me chew my own foot off. He waited until I was past the point of no return before he ran for help.
“Alpha Biel issued a reward for any information on the identity or whereabouts of the she-wolf in the trap,” my mother continued sounding excited, “Any wolf who brings credible information about her identity or whereabouts gets- it doesn’t matter what they get, Aster, you can come home.”
I shook my head, “This is my home, mom. I can’t go back there. I left a dud. Now I’m worse than a dud. I’m broken.”
“Kendrick won’t see you as broken. He loves you,” my mother promised, “If you’re his moon blessed mate. He carries your paw with him everywhere.”
“That’s psychotic,” I said horrified.
“It’s not psychotic if it belonged to his mate,” she said as if that would explain it, “It’s all he’s had of her-you for 10 years,”
“Kendrick can’t be my mate. He would have known exactly who I was when he first shifted,” I told her flatly, “And if he knew who I was, why the reward for information? All of you knew where I was. I haven’t exactly been in hiding.”
“That’s hardly fair, Aster,” my mother whispered, “We didn’t know you’d shifted. No one guessed you were the wolf in the trap.”
“Kendrick did,” I muttered, unable to look at her, “He knew.”
“Aster,” my mother gripped my left hand tightly between both of hers, they were warm and soft, so soft, “Come home.”
“I am home,” I whispered to her, it was the truth, but it smelled like a lie to my nose. I knew I couldn’t go back there. This was my home. I loved this town, my pub, my friends. My wolf whined, she wanted to go home. She wanted a pack.
“Has your wolf ever run with a pack?” my mother asked, as if finally sensing the wolf inside of me and her agitation.
I couldn’t answer her question. My wolf ran with Evan. He taught her how to fight. He taught her how to run upstairs. He was trying to teach her how to go down them. Evan was her pack.
“Aster, you need a pack,” my mother reminded me, “you’re a survivor, that much is clear, but you can’t go on like this.”
“Please don’t tell the pack about me,” I begged her, “I don’t want them to know.”
“I’ve missed you so dearly,” she continued, seeming to ignore my plea, “Alpha Biel was harsh on me as the new generations aged into the pack. I could never hold my own, even as a youth before I met your father. And now, with no mate to protect me, I am no match for the young bloods, and with no offspring to protect me-”
Tears freely flowed down my face, “I can’t protect you, mom. My wolf only has three legs. She’s...”
“A tough enough bitch to survive by any means necessary,” my mother’s harsh tone reminded me, “And the future alpha’s mate. He’ll protect her. He’ll protect you. Protect us.”
“I’m not his-You should get back there,” I told her, changing the subject, “Before Biel realizes you’re missing.”
“Come with me,” she begged gripping my hands tighter, “Please, just for the holidays. I’m so lonely.”
“Petition Alpha Biel was to visit your human daughter,” I told her, “Even he’s been known to permit that request.” I managed to hide the bitterness in my tone that she’d clearly never petitioned to visit me.
“Please, Aster,” her fingernails were digging into my hand, if she squeezed any harder, she’d draw blood.
Evan came back into the pub, and my mom dropped my hand so fast it landed with a dull thud on the table. My mother flinched under Evan’s fierce gaze.
“I’ll leave. Will you at least walk me to my car?” she asked, “So I can get a proper goodbye this time?”
I sighed and looked back at Evan, I trusted his judgement implicitly. He shrugged, “I’ll keep an eye on you, make sure you’re safe.”
“Alright,” I told her. We went back up to the apartment so I could grab my coat, scarf and gloves. The blizzard was bound to start any minute now. My mom was looking around my bedroom while I pulled on my boots.
I had framed newspaper articles from the Easterville Gazette from when Evan and I officially became owners of the Tooth and Claw, the Bionic Barmaid fundraiser, the article of me with my new arm, an article about Evan’s burgers I’d found on a travel blog. She was reading them over with a melancholic look on her face, “I’ve missed so much of your life,” she whispered, “I wish I’d been here.”
“I do too,” I told her, “But you had no choice, I was a dud, I was exiled.”
She nodded slowly, deep in thought.
We wandered out to her car. She was looking up the route home on her phone, “Looks like if I leave now, I’ll miss most of the blizzard going West.”
“Will you be allowed to call me when you’re safe?” I asked holding out my own phone eager to get her phone number. We both had been required to change numbers for my exile. No contact.
She shrugged, “Better to ask forgiveness than permission, right?” She handed me her phone and had me program my information into it.
“I’ll just send myself a text message and-” I opened her messaging app and saw the most recent message she sent.
She’ll be outside the pub in five minutes. I’ll keep her busy until you get here
I looked at the top of the page to see who she’d been texting. Kendrick Biel.
I prepared to bolt back for the safety of my pub when I heard the engine of a fast approaching car. I felt the pull, the pull I hadn’t felt since that night. My wolf wanted him bad. She was resisting me. I fought harder. I won out. I raced toward the stairs. The truck slid to a stop and the door flew open. Strong arms pulled me inside. I struggled against them, but I wasn’t strong enough.
“EVAN!” I screamed at the top of my lungs.
The truck squealed away. Through the back window I saw the back door of the pub fly open and Evan race into the parking lot.
My mother’s car was gone. She’d fled in the commotion. I kicked and screamed and bit. My bionic arm fell off at some point in the scuffle. The driver of the truck struggled to keep it going straight.
“Control her,” the male voice hissed, righting the steering again. It was blondie,
the wolf from the bar the night before.
“Aster,” Kendrick was the one I was fighting against.
“Let me go you fucking monster,” I screamed twisting my shoulders trying to get a better angle and maybe kick the truck’s window out.
“Aster, shift,” his voice was calm. Tendrils of ancient power washed over me and as quick as a blink, I was the wolf.
15
10 years earlier
I woke to a loud pounding on the door. I cautiously opened my eyes. I was facing a row of bathroom stalls. My face was pressed to cold tile. In front of me the beige tiles were stained with dried blood. A momentary flash of confusion was eliminated by the sudden recollection of the night before.
I’d shifted.
I’d been trapped.
I did what I needed to do to escape.
My right hand was asleep, no that wasn’t right, I didn’t have a hand anymore. I rolled over to look at the stump. It was no longer bloody. It had a jagged raw pink scar where the skin had knit itself together.
The banging continued. I couldn’t be seen like this. Barefoot, bloody, still in my graduation robes. I looked around the public restroom. There were windows high near the vaulted ceiling. If I could get up there, I could maybe get out. I quickly changed into clothing. I was grateful that I had anticipated a long drive so no buttons or complicated straps. I had no idea how I’d climb the walls with only one working hand. I stood on the long sink. Balanced my left hand on the wall and jumped.